2009: A Year in Review

Instead of talking about winter training (and in reality, how fun is it to talk about running in the snow by yourself), I am going to give a nice little review of the past year.

• Participated in my 5th Jump Weekend. By far my drunkest. I went nearly 36 hours without sleep and drank the whole time. Needless to say my judgement wasn't nearly as sharp as it could be and the end result was that I got the boot from the fraternity house. After some counseling where I put up a strong defense, I am now willing to take 95% percent of the responsibility for my action, 5% is still reserved for Evan Wolfe for trapping me in my room.
• We (I didn't score any points) won conference in track. I will say this, at least I qualified for the 10k. But I dropped out of the 10k when I realized me winning the race wouldn't hurt the team's chance of losing the championship.
• Got put in handcuffs.
• Went to Senior Week as a 21 year old. No need to mention what happened during this uneventful trip.
• Celebrated in the joy of seeing Coop sick and miserable at the wedding of Bruce Willis/Raven's Coach John Harbaugh and Jenny/Jenny.
• Was on my third cross country conference championship (say that five times fast) team. Again, I was not on varsity but my leadership definitely led us to victory.
• Finished my senior thesis compliments of Wikipedia.
• Blacked-out in Pittsburgh and came around standing next to Boy-o inside Primanti Bros. at two in the morning.
• Avoided failing out of Wesland for the seventh semester in a row.
• I'm going back to Pittsburgh for New Year's Eve. I can't speculate but if I did this review next year, I can only assume with everybody coming to Pittsburgh, the events should play out like Ocean's Eleven. The original, not the one with George Clooney and Matt Damon being a d-bag. We will most likely knock over a casino or a car, depending on the amount of Captain consumed.

So as you can see, my year was filled with all sorts of shenanigans that got me into varying degrees of trouble. I can only hope that 2010 is better than 2009, minus the handcuffs and whips.
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How my Christmas went:

Christmas Eve

Christmas Eve is a tradition the world over and at the C-Breezy house it is no different. The one exception is that, this is the first year I worked on Christmas Eve. It wasn't too bad for the little work I did and I came home early. But Christmas Eve involves going over to my aunt and uncle's house for my cousin's birthday.

Let be tangent here for a moment and tell you a funny story from when I was like three. My parents, possessing the same amount of wit and humor as myself one time for my cousin's birthday gave him probably the best gift ever. We went over with this huge box. It was about four feet by four feet. My cousin lit up with excitement when he saw it. But inside that box was a smaller box, then a smaller box, then a smaller box. After about ten boxes, my cousin reaches the prize...a Barney tie. I have never seen anyone looked more defeated than when he saw the outcome.

But some highlights of the dinner include:

• My other cousin's husband, which would make him like a third cousin twice removed, is from New Jersey and Italian. Needless to say, I made many references to him being a Guido.
• Most of my cousins have grown up and had kids. And I would like to say it's a scary thought when your mom says that you're good with kids. However, if any ladies out there think I would be a good dad, leave your numbers in the comment page.
• But most importantly, the nectar of life was there. Bud Light.

So now I am getting ready to go to church with a buzz and I want to wish everybody a Merry Christmas.

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The Night I Should Have Died

There are two nights that I should have I died: the night that I blacked out on vodka at 9:30 while playing Mario Kart and the night at Beach Week I. Of course the latter story is funnier than the first one.

It had to have been early in the week because this was the first time that I had formally introduced myself to the other vacationers in our area. Later in the week, GB, Poop, and Shotgun would introduce themselves later in the week, but I introduced myself early as the first of these guys.

I'm not sure if it was on a dare or a bet or an adventure, but I left the condo with the intention of going another condo to find a light for my black n' mild. The following events took place during an hour span but for some reason I thought it took about five minutes. I walked over to the loudest condo I could find which under the circumstances was pretty hard because "Summer of 69" by Bryan Adams shook the complex. But I walk in and I thought this happened immediately but I guess I could have been in there for about forty minutes. I get a light from some guy who also looked like he didn't belong at a high school party. As soon as the lighter had made contact with the end of the tobacco and a puff of smoke rose into the air, some girl politely tells me to extinguish it. Granted that I had been consuming my fair share of malt beverages during the entire day, my response went like this:

SHUT UP B&*$# I'M FUDGING LEAVING

Much like how anytime RJ or Gorbachev come out of the closet, the music came to immediate screeching stop and everybody looked at me. Sensing the upcoming awkwardness, I started to run out the door before I ran into a timid looking girl who was blocking my escape. This is when the next thing I said sounded bad:

GET OUT OF MY WAY BEFORE I PUT THIS OUT IN YOUR FACE

I ran out the door and onto the balcony with youthful abandon and looked across the way to our balcony to show my victory of a lit black n' mild. Unfortunately, out of the corner of my eye I saw what looked to be an angry mob coming after me. This wasn't just a bunch of high school kids, it was a full blown angry mob you see in the old movies with pitchforks and torches. I ran inside our room just as they came out demanding my whereabouts. I would like to believe that if my name was Jesus, they would have crucified me.

After that night, there was a very uneasy tension between our group and basically everybody else in the hotel. But luckily I did not die that night.
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Oh, and I also want to apologize for my facebook messing up and sending everybody viruses and junk. Coming soon, a new STD-free facebook account for all my fans.
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Work

If there is anything more annoying than Mischler, it is people saying the phrase "do work". I'm not sure where the phrase came from and frankly if I ever meet the person who came up that phrase, I'm going to punch them in the nuts. But my point is...I've had some interesting jobs in the past. Interning at the prosecuting attorney's office was cool, except for the constant fear I had of someone coming into the court and shooting everybody. This can be blamed on my parents letting me watch Harrison Ford movies as a kid. The next job as a lifeguard was fun as hell...except for the fear of actually having to save somebody. But until you have tried to surf down a waterslide on a mat, you haven't lived. Unfortunately, knowing CPR and how to backboard somebody out of the water could not prepare me for my next job. I work for UPS.

Every winter, UPS hires people to ride around with the drivers and deliver the goods while the driver sorts everything out. And with the pay being 10.50 an hour, it pays high for the little work that is actually required. In the four days, I have worked for UPS the following things have happened:

• I now know where every attractive secretary is in the Wharf District in Morgantown
• I have almost been in several fatal accidents involving a delivery truck and car, truck, and people
• Ran several stop signs
• Finally, some woman answered the door in her towel, now if only I was a delivering a pizza and things might have turned out differently...

However, nothing beats the thrill of riding down the interstate with the door open and nothing separting you from certain death except for a seatbelt. The noise in the cab is like riding in a cargo plane and the seat you are on literally looks like it came from an Air Force cargo plane. But for 10.50 an hour, it is worth the experience.

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Every time you look, Clint Eastwood is just putting out a movie that is racist. First Gran Torino and now Invictus.

My Favorite TV Show

Most people know that I am a die hard Mad Men fan. That show is awesome. But given how my class load worked out last semester, I was a TV fanatic. Below is a look at my daily schedule:

9:00 Wake Up
10:30 Watch an hour of Home Improvement
11:30 Catch the end of The Price is Right
12:00 Scooby-Doo and the Pink Panther
1:00 Nap
4:00 Practice
7:00 Family Guy marathon
10:00 South Park

That was my day, basically everyday. Watching Tim Taylor joke around with with Al Borland about his mom. Drew Carey, not be as good as Bob Barker during the Showcase Showdown. A lot of people don't realize it, but the Pink Panther is a very funny cartoon. Running a little on the side and my day was rocking.

But with the season finale of Mad Men and being on break, my attention turns to the two best shows that have ever come out: The Jersey Shore and Teen Mom. MTV has outdone itself. Jersey Shore is ridiculous, it is basically the Real World + Italian people. Because in a perfect world, all guidettes would have poofs and all guidos would have blowouts. Hell, I wish I had a blowout. Because then me and The Situation could go lift weights and tan together.

But a show that touches my heart and makes me giggle like a school girl is Teen Mom. The funny scale during 16 and Pregnant was like a level 10. But Teen Mom took it to a level 11. It can't be healthy that I find people's misery funny but I do. During Teen Mom, these people are the most dysfunctional people ever. The boy and girl who have a kid together and live with their mom and dad is hilarious. If the parents have a kid together is that a sibling or a cousin.

Kent State Shootout, Part II

The final results are in and Kump finished with 4534 points and Dupree finished with 4082 points. In the start of Day 2, Kump went 8.92 for 762 points in the 60m hurdles. This score put him at 3241 points in search of 4550 points meaning that he would have to score 1309 in order to hit the mark. In the pole vault, he cleared 3.40 meters for 457 points and finished the day with a 2:43 in the 1000m for 836 points.

Edgell started the with 2230 points. In the 60m hurdles, he recorded a 10.19 for 506 points, pole vault he cleared 4 meters for 617 points, and in the 1000m he finished in 2:54 for 719 points finished the heptathlon with 4082 points.

The Kent State Shootout!

Ricky Kump and Cuylor "Dupree" Edgell are competing at in this weekend's heptathlon at Kent State. Through the first day of events, Kump sits in 20th place with 2477 points and Edgell is in 26th place with 2240 points. But overall placing doesn't matter because the focus is to qualify for nationals. For nationals, the goal is 4550 for a provisional standard and 5200 points to automatically qualify. Obvisiously, 4550 points does not guarnatee getting into the national meet.

Tomorrow events include the 60m hurdles, pole vault, and 1000m run. In order for Kump to provisionally qualify for nationals, he would have to score at least 691 points per event over the second day. This is a tough challenge but we look into the fact that Kump ran 8.85 last week in the 60m hurdles, cleared 12 feet last year in the pole vault for the decathlon, and is a sub-5 minute miler. So while the odds may seem stacked against him, he could pull out a provisional standard. Also, I'm not going to get down on Edgell, but his chances for a national standard are far off...but he is a freshmen in his first multi event and he has a chance to shine in what could be his best events in the second day. But like a fine wine, he should only get better with age and I personally see him at the indoor national meet in two or three years.

The Blindside: A Review

I along with most of America went to see The Blindside. At first I was confused because I thought it was about Ray Charles. But I guess it was a different kind of blind. First, let me say that I do not want to watch Joe Theisman get his leg broken, that kind of pain just makes me sick. However, I do love watching people get hurt. A few things about the movie:

• Sandra Bullock is quite the bitch in the movie, but a hot one at that. I however can't take her acting career seriously since Miss Congeniality.
• Speaking of hot, Collins in the movie is the daughter of Phil Collins.
• I much prefered Tim McGraw as a abusive dad in Friday Night Lights, than as a nice guy in The Blindside
• Speaking of Tim McGraw, he cuts a nice figure compared to the actual dad looked like.

All these reasons are why I prefer my movies to have Morgan Freeman in them. INVICTUS COMES OUT TODAY!!!:

Beach Week 2009 Part I

There comes a time in every young boy's life when he goes through a rite of passage and becomes a man. Such things include: his first fight, his first kiss, and the first time he gets blacked-out drunk and pukes all over the place. But these are just small steps in being a man. In more advanced societies, the rite of passage usually involves killing an animal or in some cases like the Masai tribe, getting circumcised at the age of 16. But for American men, Senior Week is the epitome of the rite of passage. Nothing compares; the rampant alcohol abuse, watching fights break out, and occasionally being out in the sun. I did this at the young age of twenty-one.

Looking back, I think I had more fun because being older than everyone else should endeared me to them and make me on a god-like status. But mainly, I got drunk and tried to start fights. I was an evil god. But you don't want to hear about, you came for the infamous water story:

Some time during the week, at that point the days started to run together, everybody else had gone to bed and I was out smoking on the balcony. I came back in to find some random dude talking and/or harassing Jami. As soon I talked to him, my douchebag sensor went off and it went into overdrive when he said he was spending the night at our place. Sensing that his plan was to harass Jami into suicide, I began using my superior college intellect to get him to leave. He left and immediately there's a knock on the door. After he left again that's when I got the most brilliant idea and bonged three beers before going to bed.

Waking up the next morning, we were all surprised to see a pot of water on the stove. At the moment, I realized that folly of my plan:

Grant: Burdick, what's that water for?
Me: ah yeah...I started boiling that water in case that guy came back and I was going to throw it on him.
Everyone in the room: WHAT THE F***!

Yeah, I was going to commit murder for my friends and the guy never came around after that night. Following that incident, I was able to add him as a friend on facebook and looking back, I would have done the same thing again.
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Time for the video of the day:


well...it is finals week, so I'll be generous:

Love and Marriage

There comes a time in everybody's life when they lose someone close to them. While you may think I'm not talking about death...you couldn't be more farther from the truth. I'm talking about marriage.

I was fine with Tom getting married because it wasn't so much that we were losing a friend as we were gaining an awesome Jenny. Because Tom is a lucky man and by that point in his life, he had settled down and wasn't the wild and crazy guy we once knew him as. Plus, the wedding was awesome.

But the point of the post is about a good friend and former runner Jarren, Jarren just got engaged yesterday and it bothers me. I'm happy for him and you can believe I will be at the wedding. There is just something weird about it. Yesterday during the warm-up, the Captain made the funniest comment that I heard in a while. He said, "I can remember a little over seven months ago when Jarren was on this very same track; drunk, naked and only wearing a football helmet yelling 'don't look at my small penis'". So in my heart, I believe that Jarren is not ready to settle down. He only came out of his shell last year. But with death there is rebirth and he is in love and I'm proud of him getting married. That is why I gave him some advice.
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But with death there is rebirth:

Finals and Beach Week II

Well...it looks like finals are slowly approaching. Granted that I'm not too concerned about my grades so instead of studying, I'll be blogging and laughing at people for panicking about their grades. But after years of observation, I've noticed that our team has the following study stragies:

• The Girls: The girls team will not sleep over the four day period of finals and will find their reserve in caffeine. While their hard work is admirable and makes them look like Japanese businessmen who work 90 hour weeks, they will eventually die from stress. But in the good news department, they will be on the dean's list...except for Stank (she's dumb). I will admit that I used to be a part of this group and would only manage around three hours of sleep a night during finals, but I'm a changed man now.
• The Guys: A few of the guys on the team will panic when they realize they might be ineligible for next season, so they will only study for one class and panic about that.
• I myself, given that I cannot possibly fail out of school at this point nor lose any scholarships will relax and maybe study in between hours of watching the boob tube.
• The Captain: if there is one study strategy that has paid off brilliantly for somebody, it would be the Captain's plan to not study and only play Grand Theft Auto during finals week. I myself am not sure how he does it but he was an Academic All-American...so the results speak for themselves.

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Well, as a group we now know the dates for our next beach week. In the spirit of making things seem more important than they are, this coming year will be called BEACH WEEK II: Party in the USA. People can rest assured that I will be pushing my harder even harder this year. None of this lame four to five hours of sleep, I'm going to hope to get 2.5 hours of sleep...during the entire week.

Not really feeling too well today, so it looks like it's going to be a nice little day of watching football and napping. That being said:

WVU Meet

Here are some highlights from the WVU meet:

• Valarie Jasper placed third in the 55 finals
• Morganne Bennette won the 55 hurdles
• Sami Hart won the 500
• Bandit looking sexy in the 800 for the win
• Dwight Holden and Ricky Kump go 1, 3 in the 55 hurdle finals
• Tyler Blatchley throwing 18 meters in the shot put
• Heidi Webb got to run the 3k after sitting out most of cross season with injuries
• And some girl almost took someone's head off with a weight throw

Results

Global Warming and Sausage Lady

First things first, barring failing out of Music Appreciation next semester, I will graduate in May. But more importantly I want to point out a fact of life. There are people who for better or worse change the world around you and effect who you are as a person. Parents, good and bad teachers in school, your best friends are all examples. However, two people from my time in college have changed my life.

The first one if RJ. The only way to describe him is a 4 year old trapped in a 24 year old body. He has never grown up. He will hold a special place in my heart for usually leading me down the wrong path and somehow he has the ability to never get into trouble but I will usually get into trouble. But here are a few examples to describe him:

• In Missouri, as he is vomiting into a trash can in the hotel room, he tells Woody that he is going spoon feed s*** to Woody's kids.
• Another time, we were standing in line at Wal-Mart, a kid comes up and asks if he plays basketball for Wesleyan. RJ, always the one to overreact, starts accusing the kid of being racist. I tell the kid to ask who is father is. In case you're wondering, his dad is Bimbo Coles.
• Speaking of Bimbo Coles, a few weeks ago in Pittsburgh during a run with Rog and Gorbachev. Rog says that he going to sue Bimbo Coles for child support. RJ is a child.

But I think the greatest thing about RJ was how he used to make fun of me for not believing in global warming. Well I guess the joke is on him.

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The next person will also hold a special place in my memories from Buckhannon for mostly psychologically damaging me. SAUSAGE LADY. Last year, at least once a week, she would drive by in a truck and yell at us. The most usual taunt was "look at all that sausage" and "look at that sausage fest". But the joke is on her because she was taking up almost all of the cab in the truck she was driving. She was like bread that was baking and about to explode out of the breadmaker, that's the only way to describe it. Well yesterday, we saw her for the first time all school year, it was like witnessing Halley's Comet becuase we hadn't seen her in so long. But apparently she had more yeast in her that we thought because now she is so fat she has outgrown the truck and has moved up to an SUV.

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Just think about this: my mom one time called RJ a creeper.

Miles ran since last post: a little over 14

Senior Comprehensive Exam

too busy to write a post because of my interview in the evening, so here are some video clips:




and:

High School Running Part II

During my junior year of high school we had a cross country coach by the name of Amy. And before I tell you about her coaching style let me tell you about a story she told us at practice about perservering. She told us that at one point in college she ran a cross country race while pregnant. Now you must be thinking, this woman told a bunch of 14 to 17 year old kids about being pregnant, they must have been grossed out. The truth is...we were. And it's not that I have anything against people having kids but at the age of 16 that reaffirmed my belief that our coach was crazy.

But fastforward a few years and everyday at practice we can never figure out where to go on the runs. The girls, on the other hand, are out the door and on their way; but for some odd reason and I can never figure it out, even though they leave before us and run for less minutes than we do, we also beat them back. For example if we have a 50 minute run and they have a 40 minute run, they'll leave before us but we'll be back at the track finishing up drills and strides when they get back. Much like how I will never understand Heisenberg's Principle of Uncertainty, how we finish before the girls is just beyond me.

But back to high school and the thought of not knowing what run we were going to do never came up. That is because we did the same thing every week:

• Monday: run the cross country course twice at Apple Valley Golf Course
• Tuesday: 5 mile loop at Mary Lou Retton Park. And let me just say, I don't think they should call it Mary Lou Retton Park, because she sucks. She denied being from Fairmont and I had a chance to meet her at a Fourth of July event a few years ago and she's annoying. She's got nothing on my girl Nastia.
• Wednesday: Indian files at Prickett's Fort
• Thursday: LSD day on the Rails-to-Trails. As much as she talked about the long-but-slow day, it made me believe she was on LSD.
• Friday: run from someone's house before a spaghetti dinner
• Saturday: GAME DAY

But we did this routine every week during the course of my junior season. Which is probably why the group I ran with in high school is so used to routine. Much like Brooks in The Shawshank Redemption we became institutionalized and didn't know what to do without a set schedule. Heaven forbid we run at the park on wednesday and do Indian files on a Monday. The only difference between us and Brooks was the fact we didn't write "Brooks was here" and commit suicide.

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Miles ran since last post: about 8